What’s something most people don’t know about you?
As I stand in the open fields looking at the expansive sky, an indescribable sense of dread comes over me. I feel as if I’m going to be swallowed up or God Himself is going to reach through the bright clouds to crush me for committing a “now you’ve gone too far” kinda sin.
I feel the same way when looking at a large body of water that stretches as far as the eyes can see in any direction. I get this overwhelming sense of helplessness, being this infinitesimal creature in such a large and seemingly endless environment.
For what it’s worth, that’s what I am. We ALL are.
I just don’t like being reminded of it.
It wasn’t until recent years that I was told that it is a sign of me disliking being out of control. Not to be uncontrollable, but rather, lacking any at all. Things beyond BEYOND my control. The sense of powerlessness, or weakness.
I suppose that’s true, to some extent. I’m not “power hungry” in any sense of the world, but I don’t like the thought or feeling that I have little or nothing to do with my own fate.
I used to get that way whenever I was riding the Greyhound bus and it drove along the roads along the side of a mountain. I used to think, “What if this joker falls asleep behind the wheel?”
I know I can’t have a hand in everything in life, but when it comes to affecting my life, I definitely want some say-so. This is probably why I volunteer to help or make myself available to participate in most things. Because I’d like something to do with the outcome.
Not for the credit, it’s for the edit.
Just thought I’d answer today’s prompt and let you know something you don’t know about me.
But then again, I wouldn’t be surprised if the people in my life have known this all along…
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