My Ancestry DNA: Another Change? C’mon, Mannn…

4 or 5 years ago, there was an Ancestry DNA commercial where this guy was raised to believe that he was of German descent. His doubt began when he started finding more and more people in his tree who were NOT German. He finally decided to take the Ancestry DNA test and had to trade his Lederhosen in for a Kilt because he found out that 52% of his DNA originated in Scotland and Ireland.

I thought that commercial was hilarious…

…until it happened to me.

Many of you remember my belief that I was primarily Ghanaian until I got my own DNA kit and submitted it for analysis. Turns out, I was Cameroonian with Nigerian, Beninese and Congonese ingredients in my soup.

I went full-tilt boogie with it too. Cameroonian paraphernalia, research, downloads and dancing to Makoosa music, soccer team support in the World Cup, new friends, etc. Yeah, I was rockin’ that green, red and yellow flag with the yellow star in the center.

Now remember, I told you guys that as technology advances and more people submit personal samples, DNA results will change. As a result, I will see a fluctuation with a likelihood that any one of those locations could drop as low as zero.

A few months later, I learned that the predominant blood was actually Nigerian, leading the way at 44%. So I was only 26% Cameroonian.

But guess what? Yup, since then there’s been a new development.

(Richard Dawson voice) Survey SAYS…

I’m an 88-year-old Puerto Rican woman!!!! Separated at birth from Rita Moreno!

Ok, maybe not. Seriously though, there’s just been a slight shift. Slight.

Nigeria still dominates at 37%, but now Cameroon (Congo & Western Bantu Peoples) has risen to 31%, Benin & Togo – 16% and Ghana & Ivory Coast fall to 5%.

So really, what does this all mean? Why am I even bothering to give you such a minor update? Well first of all, I want you to know that it’s not my DNA that’s changing. It’s the up-to-date results. My DNA will never change. The RESULTS have and will continue to change, based on the AVAILABLE DATA AND TESTED PARTICIPANTS.

I’d honestly need a helluva lot more information before I could bet on the most definitive answer. But whether or not I ever learn the specific and accurate results, nothing will change who I actually am. And THAT my friends, only God and history know.

Then there’s the “African” Ancestry DNA kit, which I hear is considerably more accurate. But I won’t lie, it will be awhile before I try that one because it’s $300. Nothing against the organization, but if I had an extra $300, I’d be paying some bills right now.

The second thing I want to say is no matter what I find out, I want you all to know that it’s cool. I’ve already got the gist of it and because of that – I’ll keep rocking Nigeria. I’ll keep rocking Cameroon. I’ll keep rocking Ghana.

I’ll keep reppin’ my beautiful Africa. Because that is where the story begins. And if you’re not careful, you may look up and see that that’s where my story ends.

…because I emigrated to Ghana, Nigeria or Cameroon, where I found happiness, equality and peace.