I’m sitting in the waiting area of the BMV (what happened to “DMV”?), waiting for my number to be called when this guy jumps up, loses his footing and stumbles sideways towards me. He puts his arm out and ends up stiff-arming (love that NFL term) me in the shoulder. He didn’t hurt me, but Lord knows that could have been avoided. He smirks back in my direction as he continues on his way, but not before uttering, “My bad, playah”.
My BAD? What the hell was THAT?
Before I tell you how I feel about that phrase, let me preface it with something that I learned back in my college days…
One Sunday morning, halfway through service, the pastor talked briefly about the difference between Worldly and Godly sorrow. I will paraphrase:
- Worldly Sorrow is simply the acknowledgement that you’ve done something wrong. Oftentimes, after you’ve been caught and/or called out on it.
- Godly Sorrow is when you experience genuine remorse for something you’ve done, whether or not anyone knows about it. You feel bad because you did it! You’re concerned about how it affected others.
Powerful stuff ain’t it?
See where I’m going with this?
Telling someone “My Bad” shows little-to-no remorse for what you’ve done. It’s no different than a basketball player, holding his hand up high to admit that he was wrong after being whistled for a foul.
No, I don’t expect you to drop down on your knees and scream, “A thousand pardons, Milord. I have sinned against you, therefore I must be purged”, but a simple “I’m sorry” would be more appropriate (and DEFINITELY better appreciated).
Stop. Look me in the eyes like a man when you talk to me. And here’s the jackpot suggestion: Ask me if I’m alright!!
As a society, we have gotten so far away from the common courtesies of heartfelt statements that we (hopefully) were taught at a young age.
“I’m sorry”, “I was wrong”, “Please”, “Thank you”. Like pulling teeth with some people. Someone asked me for a favor once and after I agreed to do it, he replied, “Bet that up”. Call me petty, but that’s not gratitude. Say, “Thanks”.
For the record, I’m not judging or telling you what to say and what not to say. Just know when it’s wiser and more humane to use the alternative. Please.
And if you’re uncomfortable or just too cool to say, “I’m sorry” or “I apologize”, at least have the good sense to make your gesture believable. Facial expression, body language and tone of voice always help.
I don’t think it’s necessary to expound any further. You get the gist.
Besides, I need to work on keeping my blogs short enough for you to read before your phone battery dies.
So here endeth the lesson. And if you disagree or think I said an awful lot just to say nothing…
…my bad. I got’choo playah!
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