New Year, OLD Me (But Work In Progress)

I originally intended to write and post this during the final days of 2019, then decided against it for fear of intimidating people who really wanted to do better in the new year. But things change. They always do…

Here we are, a few days into 2020 and I’m still seeing “New Year, New Me” posts rolling up my Instagram timeline, which is expected. It was cool until I noticed posts of this nature from two people who I know for a FACT, said this last year (and one of them, the year before THAT because I remember joking with her about 2018 being a nice round year for her, since she has this thing about odd numbers).

Yeah, I have to blog about it now…

What is it about that phrase that makes people feel content about life when the NYE Ball finally drops in Times Square? Why do people feel it’s officially time to be something they supposedly were not, just seconds prior?

I mean, let’s be honest: If you ask someone how it feels to be married after their vows have been exchanged, apart from the excitement, there are many feelings, but none of them involve a physical change. Same thing with turning 21. You’re a day older. Nothing more. If you’re me, you’re frustrated because no one cards you now that you’re no longer carrying a false ID. And if you tell me it’s an attitude thing, show me me someone who’s disposition has changed and I’ll give you someone who goes back to the their old ways by Valentine’s Day, right after their relationship has gone sour.

So why does a new year mean you are or will be a new YOU?

I’m not condemning or dismissing people for saying it, but my approach is based on my reality. On January 1, 2020, I went from 52 and 3 days old to 52 and 4 days in age. There is nothing new about me. Sure, I can change my attitude and my approach in life, but it’s still the same old, overweight, double knee replacement, high blood pressure having diabetic with a bad back. But I (and here’s the key) haven’t given up and succumbed to the woes of worn muscles, weak bones and gravity.

So here’s my point. If you simply say “new me” without a game plan for improvement, it’s not going to just happen. You have to make a conscious decision to make a better life for yourself. Me, I’ve decided to stop living the life that has been dominated by the the doldrums of being on the wrong side of 50, which include apathy, complacency and sloth.

There is no “new me”. There is the OLD me, that needs dusting off and a severe oil and attitude change. And it has begun, but it began with acceptance of what is and what isn’t. I know my position and thoughts in life desire changing, so I spend each day thanking God for a new day and promising to make the most of it. I’m back in the gym, with tomorrow being the successful completion of the first of 52 6-day weekly workouts. I’ve also been able to avoid sugar, fast food, fried food, cake/cookies, pop (not “soda”), ice cream, white bread (well, for the most part on the bread) and other bad foods. I’ve begun new reading, which will be maintained daily. I’m praying more, meditating, contacting relatives and friends, spending more time with family, and so forth and so on. You get the gist. But it’s not a new me. It’s the old me, acknowledging that my life’s hourglass will not send the sands back up to the upper portion. It’s the old me, knowing I can improve on my physical condition, mental state, financial status, etc. I’m still the old me, but like the song in the musical Dream Girls, “I Am Changing”.

…and that’s it. No reason to go on about this because I’m sure you understand. I am not new. I’m still me, but I’ve acknowledged what needs to be corrected and more important, putting it into play. And I intend to keep at it with a passion.

So check back in about 360 days and ask me that question again. Together we can look at what I was vs. what I’ve become and then, only then, can we decide that I am indeed, a “NEW ME!”

2 comments

  1. Amen! I’m not fond of that phrase. I think when people do change, as I did post divorce (I’m way more self loving and self confident), they don’t make an announcement or proclamation, it just happens as they begin to recognize the chains that have been holding them in bondage – be it spiritual, physical or emotional. And it takes time. Thanks for sharing.

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  2. “Why do people feel it’s officially time to be something they supposedly were not, just seconds prior?”

    I think this has to do with an idea that for some reason people seem to think that with the changing of the calendar page that they’ll be leaving themselves behind. As if all thise bad habits, mindsets, problems, etc will just magically disappear. As we all know that’s not the case! Personally I’ve set goals as opposed to resolutions for this year that align with what I’ve already been working towards for sometime now. I can wrap my head around that better than this list that only I have to answer for if I make some big proclamation at the start of it.

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