Retail Re-Tales: “We Don’t Speak That Name…”

Columbus, Ohio 2016

Before I begin this shorter than average story, if you have been following along for any decent length of time, you know I love talking about my shopping experiences. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I just walk into extraordinary situations…

…it’s just, well, I don’t know how to ignore things…

…or walk way…

…or keep my mouth shut.

Case in point…

Finalizing my purchases at the front register of Aldi grocery store, the cashier asked me if I wanted cash back from my debit card. I jokingly told her “no” and that I wasn’t permitted to request cash without my wife being present for approval, as I was considered “dangerous with money”. Funny, but true.

Amidst the laughter behind me, a young man spouted, “Yo’ playa! Ain’t you a little old to be lettin’ some b**ch tell you how to manage yo’ money?”

Yes, it’s easier to just be silent, finish my transaction and leave. But like the song says, “If You Don’t Know Me By Now”…

I smiled and replied, “Young ‘playa’, age is not a factor. And one of the reasons that I’m still married after 20 years is that I don’t refer to her as the “B” word, “H” word or any OTHER disrespectful word or title for that matter. I don’t call ANY woman that.”

You could hear the “Mmm-Hmmmms” and “You tell it!” from the ladies within earshot.

I continued, “…and I’m sure YOUR woman doesn’t appreciate it EITHER!”

He proudly retorted, “I ain’t GOT no woman tellin’ ME what to do!”

I couldn’t help but laugh as I turned away and walked out, but not before announcing loudly as I gestured with one hand, “Let the church say…”

“AMEN!!!” Answered the people in line as we all laughed and I continued my exit.

He’ll get it someday…

In the meantime, this has been, another Retail Re-Tale.